The year 1970 was a particularly good one if you fancied ‘rithmetic. Take this Ford Falcon Futura Club Coupe — it saves money in so many ways. Yet you don’t have to give up spaciousness and color choices. The interior is even “plush and inviting,” according to Ford’s helpful brochure (you’ll want to read the complete story here). And think about how much you’ll impress grandma with the prudence of your automotive purchase. This one’s a keeper.
As appealing as that sounds, you would have had a few other great choices in 1970. For example, have you ever considered playing the accordion? “Playing the accordion does it every time!” says Dave Biasco, President and Import Director of the Accordion Corporation of America. He can get you a great deal on an accordion made by Italy’s most famous craftsmen!
Indeed, Dave guarantees that you could save 50 percent on any comparable “new sound” electronic or standard accordion.
If that’s still too expensive, Dave will consider trading anything of value. “Tell us what you have . . . get bigger than ever trade-in allowance!” says Dave.
Some of you may prefer an outdoorsy activity. Are you interested in a boat? We’re not just talking about any old boat. Chrysler Marine Products have what it takes to get you wherever you want to go . . . and even where you don’t.
As a helpful suggestion, Chrysler notes that you could plausibly “launch the ‘swinging’ season'” with a Swinger 3.6 outboard. Or you could go racing with their 135 hp cruiser. But be careful — you might end up farther away than you thought possible.
So which exciting choice will it be?
Also see ‘Lee Iacocca got lucky with the 1964-66 Ford Mustang’
BROCHURES & ADVERTISEMENTS:
- oldcarbrochures.org: Ford Falcon (1970)
- Popular Science, February 1970: Chrysler Marine Products (p. 2); Accordion Corporation of America (p. 157)
This parody was originally posted on May 7, 2017 and updated on Oct. 2, 2020 and April 1, 2024.
An accordion?! Too funny, Steve.
The 1970 Ford Futura ! The future is a part of its name ! In Australia, based on a You-Tube video, the Futura is a collectible automobile “Down Under”!
https://www.hemmings.com/stories/1970-ford-falcon-sells-for-230000/?utm_medium=email&utm_source=EDaily&utm_campaign=2023-12-07
And Grand’ma wouldn’t like to see you imitating this driver involved in a car chase with an Aussie Valiant police car from the Australian early 1970s police drama “Matlock Police” (not related with the other Matlock drama show starring Andy Griffith). 😉
The name Biasco sounded familiar, then I checked the address. I grew up a couple miles from there. They’re still doing business as Biasco music in downtown Chicago.